Tag: happy

The Girl On The Left

On By gabriellestroup1 Comment

On 12/15/18 I graduated from UNL with my Bachelor’s. I was the first ever person on my dad’s side to graduate with a degree. This day was very special, and just like any grad, I was so proud of myself of what I had just accomplished.

As much as I’d love to say that I was as happy as I looked in this picture, it would be a complete lie. Don’t get me wrong, I was proud, excited, and beyond overwhelmed by this accomplishment, but the happiness I should’ve been feeling was masked by depression, fear, and a broken heart.

I remember celebrating with my family afterwards and just not being able to get to the happiness level I so desperately wanted to be at. I knew in my head that I needed to put the sadness and depression away for just one day, but no matter how hard I tried, it wouldn’t go away. I remember being so frustrated with how much this sadness in my life affected me. I was so mad that a stupid broken heart was stopping me from enjoying MY day. And honestly, the following months were followed by the same broken feeling.

At the beginning of this year I did everything I could to change all the areas of my life. I wanted a healthier lifestyle, a more positive attitude, to be a better friend, to be a better family member, to enjoy the little things in life, to glow up mentally and emotionally. I even have it written down as my “Lifetime Goals”.

Everyday was TRULY a battle with depression, but when I say a battle, I fucking mean it. What didn’t help was that I was at a job that worsened this depression. I knew that I needed to better ALL areas of my life. This year I lost weight, gained a healthier lifestyle, grew closer to the friends that were healthy for me, got rid of the ones that weren’t, and honestly, I matured greatly. 2019 was a true rough one for me, and I knew I NEEDED to get through it to make me a stronger person overall. I knew I had to push myself through all that life was throwing at me (which it threw a fucking lot, let me tell ya) and just simply get through it.

And that’s my advice: Push, and get through it. Because I knew that once I did, the great things would start happening. As cheesy or cliche as that sounds, the good and amazing things that happened for me were waiting at the end of all the madness.

TO END MY 2019 I:

Applied and got into UNK for my Master’s in School Counseling.

I realized that I was not going to move away from my family as I originally planned. Do you know how many times I applied for jobs outside of Nebraska? They didn’t turn out for various reasons, but I know for a FACT that they didn’t work out for a reason. I am meant to be here in Lincoln….for now at least! I opened my eyes and had to do a little “soul searching” and figure out a plan B. What could I see myself doing? What made me happy? What do I love in life? What am I interested in? And then it hit me. I really love kids, don’t love teaching though, but love being there for others. I love helping, listening, giving advice and guiding.

I also recognize that we NEED more counselors in this world. We need more SUPPORT for our kids! We need more GUIDANCE, and AWARENESS in our schools! I WANT to be that person! I want to make a difference. I want to roam and scout for the kids that separate themselves, who may be getting bullied, who are acting out, who have a hard home life, who just need someone. I desperately want to be the person who helps these growing kids, just how the counselor in my middle school helped me. And that’s how I knew…school counseling is my calling.

GOT A NEW JOB THAT I LOVE

To make this one simple, my old job was deteriorating my mental health. It was a dead end road. I loved my co-workers, but there was just nothing there for me, and it didn’t make me happy at all. I needed to find something that was going to take me to the next level in life. I needed something that I was going to actually look forward to, and was a POSITIVE impact on my life. And there it was, Nebraska Family Dentistry! Just like all my other jobs, it’s so random, but I’m always up for new things, and new challenges. This job has helped me in more ways than one.

GOT MY OWN APARTMENT

Honestly, this is probably something only I’m really excited about BUT it’s been a BIG impact on me, and it really was something that I needed. I’ve been so over roommates, and I’ve been dying for my own space. Ever since I’ve been single, I’ve been working on my independence. I truly love doing my own thing, having my own space, and not having to share anything with anyone. I have truly loved maturing, growing up, and working out life within myself.

This year has challenged me, and has pushed me to grow. I would seriously would not be here if a break up didn’t happen, and I was forced to look in the mirror and figure my shit out. I will always believe that everything is meant to happen. Although there have been so many struggles and obstacles within this year, I wouldn’t change it for the world.

These pictures were taken exactly a year a part. 12/15/18 to 12/15/19. The girl on the left was depressed, heart broken, and so lost. She had no idea what was coming, or what she was going to do.

The girl on the right has finally found her happiness, has found her way, and is FINALLY proud of all of her accomplishments, big and small.

Updates to come for 12/15/20!

This Season

On By gabriellestroupLeave a comment

I once saw a friend post that another person’s season may be different than your own. You may look at them during a time where all is going well and falling into place. Their puzzle pieces were aligning and finding their place, all while your pieces may still be hidden or jumbled around. This is why you can’t compare your season with theirs, because your season may be one of healing and growth and learning. And it’s hard to tell a definitive way how you start and finish a season, but I’ve decided that today was the start of a new season for me.

This new season is conveniently falling on the first day of Fall and the start of Libra season, which is exactly the sign that I am. I guess I just mentally decided that this long, weird, and confusing chapter of mine needed to end. Although I’ve been trying to find my way, it’s really been a difficult time. Only the closest people to me have known about the bumps. But I’ve always been an open book. So,

This past season I was open and vulnerable with someone so undeserving of it, and I learned that you cannot jump in with both feet before you test out the water. I am way too caring for people who do no reciprocate or even ask how I’m doing/ I do not need to be patient with someone unless I am shown a reason to be. I am continuously on the fence about wanting to move away, but then don’t want to be away from my family. I want to go to grad school, but am not sure if I should. I think I want to become a middle school counselor, but then I think about journalism.

Andddd cue what my therapist would say: focus on one thing at a time.

Easier said than done with someone with anxiety and constant overthinking.

This season

This season I need to figure some things out, but one thing at a time. As I do scroll on the multiple social media platforms and see others moved away, or starting a new career, or getting engaged, or getting married, or getting pregnant…that is their season right now, and this is my season. My season should be about me, about my life, about continuous growth, and becoming more of a better person. I will figure out a path for my future. I will put my foot down to people who are not going to help my journey. I will make this season better than the last.

I reflect a lot, all the time actually, and I’ve made tremendous strides that I think my younger self would be proud of. I have overcome some of the hardest things, mentally and emotionally, and at the end of the day, I know I’m going to be ok. This season is going to better, more enriching, more encouraging, and more rewarding. This headspace is one that is open and positive and ready for continuous progress.

I hope you do not compare your season with others, because it’s your season. Make it what you will. Make your tree leaves change color, fall, and then grow new ones. Make your ice tough and thick but vulnerable at the touch of warmth. Make it rain all day long, but the next be sunny, with flowers growing and blooming. Make your season warm and prosperous, but then appreciate the cool breeze when it comes and goes.

Because it’s your season, you get to decide how and when it comes and goes.

Living Your Best Life

On By gabriellestroupLeave a comment

Right now I’m currently sitting on my bed, PJ’s already on, listening to nine minutes of nature sounds just so I can focus on writing this. I’m not the only one who listens to nature sounds while working on something, right?

I’m really excited to write this post only because it’s fun for me. Summer isn’t even over and I feel as if I’ve been living the best summer so far. You know that saying that Andy from The Office says,

I wish I knew last year was going to be part of my “good old days” before I left them, but this year it’s different. This time I’m very much aware of how great life is right now. These past few months I have been truly living the best days of my life so far. For you, you need to grasp onto this time and make it the best. You need to live fully, and start appreciating life NOW before you’re stuck in the future regretting how you wished you appreciated them more.

Before I share the incredibly fun things that I’ve done, I just want to state that living your best life is all about mentality. It doesn’t mean you have to travel to live your best life or do all these fancy, cool things, it just means having the best attitude towards life. It means feeling free from anything heavy wearing down on your heart and spirit. It means the heavy has been let go and you’re tackling a new and fun phase in life. It means embracing this amazing adventure we were given and making the best of it all.

Surround yourself with people who know how to make things fun. Surround yourself with people who will lift you up and inspire you. Surround yourself with nature, your favorite hobbies, things you’re passionate about, etc.

Push yourself to do new things, even when it scares you. Do the things that make you happy, it could be the smallest thing or something you’ve always wanted to try.

What’s helping me live my best life? Quality family time. Girl time. Traveling. Doing different things. Being adventurous and spontaneous.

The pictures above represent the happiness I’ve been living and enduring, and the fun things I’ve been able to do recently. I have been living it up. I have let the hurt and pain of the past slip away and have been absorbing these amazing times I have been blessed to have. With being in Colorado in April, Missouri, Florida and Iowa just in June alone. I get to go to my first Sporting KC game in a couple of weeks. I’m going to Cardi B in late July, and to Alabama in September. People, living life happily is by finding joy in the upcoming events. Find things to look forward to. Travel A LOT. Go on weekend trips or to the lake. Be ADVENTUROUS and don’t let life not let you LIVE. We all have responsibilities, but what is life about if we’re not going to ENJOY it?

I am living my best life and I don’t care who knows it. Seven months ago was a hard and trying time, but now I am thriving. I embrace who I am, I’ve grown from the pain, I keep learning, and I keep living. Life is great and I can’t wait for the many fun adventures to come. What’s stopping you from living your best life?

Be The Best Version of You, For YOU

On By gabriellestroupLeave a comment

Even at the young age of 22 I have learned greatly about myself, life, people in general, what I want/ don’t want, and what I deserve. I still have so much to learn though. Although young, I do strongly believe that due to my experiences, my advice is valid.

It took me a few months to really realize why I was choosing to become the better version of myself. At first it started off trying to prove to someone what they were missing out on. To prove that “This is what you’re missing, now watch me grow”. Over time as I was growing mentally and choosing to be healthier all around, I knew that this was the start of the best version of myself. Over time my self love was coming back, I realized what is most important in my life, and have been thoroughly living my best life. Now that it’s been a few more months, I know that I am not growing inwardly and becoming a better me for anyone else but ME.

It’s silly to think I was growing to prove to someone else what they were missing, but how long does it have to take us to realize that we are not LIVING our lives for others, but we are LIVING for US? No one is going to stick around me for my whole life but ME. I am the only one who is going to be there for me at the end of each day. Of course I have my family and friends, but some days I am not going to be able to just run to a friend or my parents and ask for comfort.

The only person I’m going to have at each day is ME. So, I need to be the best me, for me. Read that again.

But let me admit something to you: I am not perfectly happy. I am still in this funk of confusion on what my next chapter in life will be: what career choice I’m going to pursue and where I want to move. It has not been easy figuring this all out, but while all this confusion is happening, it’s not going to stop me from living fully. My grand timing will come, I know I’ll figure it out, but I refuse to sit around and mope about it.

The past few months I have been planning, planning, PLANNING. I am planning out trips, soccer games, concerts, and throwing myself into my hobbies. I am finally realizing that I don’t want to live this fun, fulfilling life for anyone else, or need to prove anything. I’m going to enjoy my life and my time, the people in it and that’s all that really matters. I’ll always remind myself that whomever walks out of my life is missing out, because THIS Gabby is truly loving herself, her life and the people who have stayed.

Getting into this healthier and happier head space can be such a challenge! I have overcome so many mental barriers, and STILL battle with my inward insecurities.

  1. It all starts with surrounding yourself with people who ALSO want the best for you AND themselves. The individuals who CARE and WANT you to thrive are the only people you should be having any sort of relationship with!! Please understand this concept! How do you plan on growing if others are stagnant?
  2. Read positive prayers, posts, articles all day every day! Be inspired and stay inspired! Unfollow negative and unnecessary social media accounts and follow motivational and positive ones!
  3. Work out and eat healthy. It can be hard, but there aren’t any excuses. It helps your mental health just as much as your physical.
  4. Those days where you feel defeated, refer to #1 and go to those individuals for love and guidance. Reach out, reach out, REACH OUT if you need to!! There is no shame in needing an extra hand.
  5. Practice mental happiness. You need to tell yourself positive thoughts to believe positive thoughts. You need to tell yourself it’s going to be a great day, for it TO BE a great day!
  6. Slow but surely, start loving yourself. Look in that mirror and say out loud the things you love about yourself (personality or physically). No one is going to love you, as much as you do. And if you think you have someone who loves you more than you do, then you need to work on your self love girl. You need to be your own #1 fan.

Start being the best version of you, for you, and then you will attract all sorts of positive interactions, people, and experiences. This life is not meant to be lived wallowing. Live it. The Fuck. Up.

Thank you for coming to my talk.


Self love is the greatest middle finger of all time.

Everyone Deserves To Be Loved

On By gabriellestroupLeave a comment

There are people in this world that repress love in all forms. They will unintentionally, or intentionally, push away the ones that love them the most. There are multiple reasons why someone could be doing this. It could be stemmed from childhood memories, or how they grew up. Could be from previous relationships that did not end well. It could be because that person does not know how to love themselves firstly, and is having a hard time expressing a love to another. What I do know for certain though is: Everyone deserves to be loved. Everyone.

You could be the kindest person, or one who views themselves as unlovable, but ultimately, whoever you are, you deserved to be loved. And that can be so scary. I know how it feels to feel unlovable. My first boyfriend made me feel invaluable and not special. He made me feel as though I couldn’t do better, but eventually I found my way and I moved on to someone else! Although I’m single now, I know I deserve the best kind of love there is, just like everyone else.

What genuinely makes me sad is when people push away the ones that love them the most. My recent ex pushed me away, for multiple reasons, but linking this post to another, you cannot control the decisions of others, so whatever is meant to be, will be. He still deserves the best kind of love, even if he pushes it away.

The thing is, we’re all scared of love. It pushes you to be vulnerable and to trust someone fully, and that could potentially lead to heartbreak. Personally, I feel very scared to love again. I know how it feels to break so gruesomely on the inside, and I never want to go through that again. I know how it feels to feel the worst kind of disappointment. I know how it feels to wonder why it didn’t work out, and why you weren’t enough. I know how it feels to feel every kind of sadness there is. Honestly, I’m not looking forward to opening myself up to someone new, or to “start over”. It scares the shit out of me actually. And secretly, I don’t want to do it. It’s not like I’m searching anyway; I’m more focused on working on myself to be honest, but when I do run into a new potential love– I know it’s going to scare me. But here I am, reminding myself just as I am reminding you: we all deserve the best and the most pure kind of love there is. A love that does not fail. A love that is full of happiness, sadness, trust, laughter, friendship, strength, and everything else there is that love provides. It will not be perfect, but it will be everything we need. It will be worth the wait..and guess what? When it finally does come, we’ll deserve it!

Perspective: the silver lining in every situation

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Take a minute to really understand and grasp the meaning behind these pictures. These two pictures are powerful, and should serve as daily reminders that there is always a silver lining behind every difficult situation.


“Baby, don’t you know, all o’them tears gon’ come and go. Baby you just gotta make up your mind that every little thing is gonna be alright.” Be Alright- Ariana Grande

As creatures of habit, and ones that tend to find little things to bitch about, it is important to start changing your perspective and mindset for the better. Behind every hard situation is something beautiful waiting to be revealed. Take a minute to think of something you have gone through, and now think of why you’re grateful that situation happened.

In 8th grade I went through severe depression. I started counseling, my dad called the principal to see if changing schools would be the best option, and no one understood what was going on. I was in a horrible rut. I cried every day, I had no appetite, I had no desire to go to school, I was confused about life and who I was. I was scared of everything, and it was a horrible horrible time in my life. For months I was like this. BUT the silver lining that came to light was that when I came out of my depression I turned into the most outgoing, goofy, more confident little lady. Looking back, I am so glad I had to go through that to find out who I was. Obviously I didn’t learn everything about myself, but it turned me into a confident girl, ready to take on challenges that did not scare her, and I am so proud of who I was and who I turned into. The flower picture above is what describes this situation most. I BLOOMED after my depression.

I have gone through three break ups. Three heart breaks that were devastating and horrible, where my first two boyfriends really fucked me up mentally and it was so so challenging to get through those. But I learned new things about relationships, myself, what I wanted out of a guy, and re-learned how amazing I was!

“It’s like something has to die to help you realize – damn I feel alive.” Alive – Kehlani


During the hard times, find the positives! I know its hard, trust me!! But once you focus on your mentality, and focus on having a healthier mentality, you are starting the journey to a more positive lifestyle and attitude! Becoming a more positive person takes practice! It’s not a switch that you can flip, but a mentality that takes time to form and deploy in your daily life.

So start practicing! And if you’re going through a hard time right now, please know that there is something beautiful and magical awaiting to be unfolded and discovered. I STRONGLY believe that everything happens for a reason, so please continue on working on being the happy, positive person that you can be, and then life will show you kindness and love back. God gives you what you need, and He shows you what you don’t need. He teaches us these beautiful lessons, and we HAVE to trust Him.

2/1/19 was the clarity I needed

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This weekend did it for me! And before I even explain anything, just know that figuring out what I wanted to say, and how I wanted to say it, was definitely challenging. I have so much I want to express, and so much I want to share, that I didn’t even know what to title this. But let me just tell you: 2/1/19 was what I needed.

Sometimes after a breakup, you go through so many difficult paths, emotions, and thoughts. This one has been really challenging for me, because when I love, it’s deep and real, and loyal. But it takes awhile to get to the point where you figure out that everything really is going to be just fine without that person! And if they don’t want you in their life, then why THE FUCK would I want them in mine? It’s so simple right? But no person can fully grasp that after a break up.

I can only think of me in this situation and what is going to better MYSELF. During these almost three months, I have chosen to grow mentally, I have chosen to mature, I have chosen to eat cleaner, I have chosen to dedicate myself to the gym, and I have chosen to proceed with moving on. It took little steps, and it also took a freakin’ village, and I am so so grateful for that village of supporters. The difference about me is that I chose to reach out to my support group, and I chose to do what I needed to do to get back to happy Gab. And let me tell you, I am back to loving myself, I am back to being silly and goofy, and I am back to being the cool me that I know that I am.

In the past three months I have been to Denver twice, Florida in December, and headed to LA this coming weekend. I’m healthier mentally and physically, and guess who is looking for jobs out of state?? This girl! Woo! Is that independent enough for you? *cough cough* Guys, I am so excited for the future, and I can’t tell you enough how happy I am about life. It was dark for a bit, and emotions would be going up and down, but I am so lucky!

So cheers to a day filled with happy thoughts, well-wishes, but mainly, CHEERS TO MOVING ON. If you choose to digress, then that’s on you. My potential is unlimited, and I’m climbing baby, so watch the fuck out.


What I’ve been up to the past 3 months!